If you have been following along, you know this year was unprecedented with heartache, hurdles, plan changes and unimaginable days, weeks, and months.

This year has also been illuminated by love, learning, wonder, and connection. I have grown immensely in my understanding of my true self, my Universe, empathy and boundaries.

Things that have helped:

Remembering to breathe.

Meditation.

Movement.

An amazing psychologist (a touch of Prozac).

A group of incredibly devoted women, my soul sisters from all stages of life.

Those willing to stick it out and be in the weeds with us as we navigate.

The listeners.

The dinners.

Re-alignment in my story of “why me” and “poor me” to “why not me” and “bring on the next step”.

Persistence.

Bathing in nature.

Getting sun.

Saying yes to things that serve me and my family.

Being open to the Universe.

Listening to my intuition.

Having the most supportive life partner.

Surgeons and oncologists willing to be with me, hold my hand, and take on my challenging case.

Having the Littles as distraction, motivation, and connection to the future of life.

Acupuncture.

Physical therapy.

Expandance.

“Doing” so I can step out of being overwhelmed.

Allowing space for the dark.

Accepting this has my human journey.

It’s truly a challenging time of year for me. The holidays remind me of saying goodbye to Liz and they remind me of my own journey over the past year. I often feel this time is year causes reflection on my life so far here on Earth.

As the sun comes up this morning, I am thankful to be present in a totally different way than a year ago. I am forever changed. My boys are forever changed. My relationship with my person is forever changed. Gratitude wells up and almost brings me to tears… the friends and providers that never gave up on me and my health. I am here, I am breathing.

Mantras:

Thank you Universe. Gratitude. Breathe.

Music:

Benson Boone, Beautiful Things